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Millwall Supporter Flies Solo

28 Mar

Nobody enjoys losing, especially a paying customer at a sporting event. A sense of time wasted sets in, a stomach in knots thinking about what could have been, and in extreme cases of stupidity the need to commit an act of violence. Sometimes defiance substitutes nicely for flailing fists and in the case of one lonely Millwall supporter,  standing up to the thousands of traveling Leeds fans was an acceptable alternative.

In response to his team losing 1-0 at home, this man took on the entire North Stand hurling profanities and eventually issuing a “slit your throat” sign. All the while, the Leeds fans embraced this moron by serenading him with a few cheeky songs of their own to illuminate how completely insignificant his actions were.

You lost buddy so just deal with it. Your team is shit anyway sitting just a few points off relegation in England’s second division. There is really nothing more pathetic than a desperate supporter seeking an upper hand in defeat.

Millwall Supporters Defend Their Town From Looters

10 Aug

Bobby Robson, manager of Ipswich in 1978, said of Millwall fans after fights erupted throughout The Den during an FA Cup match, “They [the police] should have turned the flamethrowers on them.” When you consider the history of Millwall supporters, that could be construed as a compliment.

It would exhaust too much time and effort to recount the past of Millwall FC supporters, but in short, they were some of the worst torchbearers of English hooliganism in the 1970′s. (There is a great movie called “Green Street Hooligans” which will give you some idea.)

So amidst the anarchy engulfing England at the moment, one would expect that many of these imbeciles are indeed football supporters and hooligans who crave violence for the sake of violence. Well, think again. In times of such chaos, it is the hard-line Millwall supporters who are taking to the streets to defend their home turf from the looters. Singing in unison “no one loots us,” the small group of supporters can be seen pictured above pictured guarding downtown Eltham.

However that was the middle of the afternoon. Once the sun set and the rioters re-emerged, the supporters sprung into action. The two videos after the jump show Millwall supporters and police chasing rioters down the street. It’s a sensational scene by a group of individuals long chided as social enigmas, but still every bit a part of English society as anyone else to defend it. Continue reading

Meet The Terrys – The Most Morally Corrupt Family in England

16 Dec

Drugs, cheating, national ridicule, international ridicule, and now suicide – the consequences heaped upon society by the embarrassing and immature behavior of the Terry family over the past two years. For a time, there was an argument to be made that the actions of Captain England’s family were by no means a measuring stick of his own moral capacity. He bought his divorced parents homes or anything they wanted, and whatever they chose to do on their own was of no reflection of John. Well, that ridiculous tale of innocence soon blew up in all our faces, after the disclosure of the Wayne Bridge affair before the World Cup.

It can now be stated, with utmost certainty, that the limitations in rational decision making exhibited by the parents were passed down to their children. So without further ado, I am proud to introduce you to the most morally corrupt family in England, who now have blood on their hands:

Sue Terry, Mother – Accused last year of shoplifting almost £1,450 pounds of merchandise from a Tesco store in London with a friend. She and her accomplice were arrested and subsequently cautioned by the authorities. At least her upstanding and morally conscious son pulled the plug on plans to host his family in a box at Wembley for an England friendly.

Ted Terry, Father – A few months after his divorced wife forgot to pay at the check-out counter, Ted was taped selling cocaine to an undercover News of the World reporter in a wine bar bathroom. He agreed to sell three grams for £120 – provided he received an additional £40 to buy a gram for himself (not the brightest of drug dealers). Don’t worry, he met the wrath of the police bar owner who banned Terry from his establishment.

John Terry, Captain England - Mr. Terry had an affair with his teammate and very good friend Wayne Bridge’s girlfriend, subsequently getting her pregnant. The story became public just months before England set off to South Africa, and resulted in Bridge excusing himself from the side (not that his presence on the pitch would have made any difference). The scandal led to one of the most anticipated and watched pre-match handshakes in history, as Bridge walked right by his old friend. The affair ultimately ruined Bridge’s career with the national team.

Paul Terry, Brother - Following in his brother’s footsteps and taking it one step further, Paul had an affair with his teammate’s girlfriend, Lindsey Cowan. Dale Roberts, 24, was devastated after the story broke in January, but recently moved back in with his girlfriend to try and re-start their relationship. However, John Terry’s actions cast Roberts as “the other Wayne Bridge” and he began taking anti-depressants.  On Tuesday, Cowan returned home to find her boyfriend hanging in their flat of an apparent suicide. Well done, Paul.

Other than the now vanquished Mansons and Husseins, I’m not sure another family could compete with the Terrys when it comes to breaking the law and completely disregarding the foundations and standards, which allow society to function humanely.

But nobody’s perfect, right?

Violent Scenes In Birmingham

2 Dec

The English can’t do anything right these days. And this evening, on the very eve of the World Cup announcement for 2018 and 2022, terrible scenes of violence and flares marred the Carling Cup quarterfinal match between Birmingham City and Aston Villa. The 2nd city derby is an extremely ugly one, perhaps not always evident to outsiders, but there is endless hate for the opposition coursing through the veins of both clubs’ supporters.  Birmingham defeated their crosstown neighbors at home 2-1 prompting an immediate pitch invasion from the fans.

With no interest in truly celebrating, the fans ran straight to the visiting supporters in order to taunt and instigate. Villa fans responded by ripping seats out and throwing them towards the mass of humanity, followed by an extensive volley of flares to and fro between the groups of supporters.

First off, the Birmingham authorities should be embarrassed for not properly dispatching enough security officials before the match. It’s not the first time these two clubs have faced each other (119 to be exact), and they now look incredibly irresponsible for not preparing accordingly. Secondly, England have already done more than any other bid in history to ruin their chances of securing a World Cup, and this surely could not have helped matters. Does Prince Harry need to travel to Switzerland now to clean up this mess?

Meaningless fines and slaps on the wrists will result. We’ll know for sure in about 12 hours whether or not there are wider ramifications.

A more extensive video of the violence after the jump

(Photo courtesy of Daily Mail)

Continue reading

Why England won’t win Euro 2012

9 Nov

Tactics, formations, players, subs, starters, weather, opponents. You can dissect them all and still not find the main reason England will not succeed at the European Championships in 2012.

All you need is this:

England keeper gets obliterated two days before Montenegro clash

11 Oct

http://www.youtube.com/v/iB_NO4el9GM?fs=1&hl=en_US

The English never learn. The coaching staff never learns. The manager never learns. The players still haven’t learned.

The backlash from this summer’s World Cup was very straight forward – these players are thrust into fame and fortune at such a young age and don’t know any better. They are irresponsible, rash, aggressive, hot-headed, and believe they as individuals are bigger than the game itself. So you’d think Capello would have cracked down on this type of behavior by those representing the Three Lions, especially the young ones new to the squad.

Not a chance. England’s most talented goalkeeper, Joe Hart, spent his weekend at Puerto Banús in Marbella to celebrate (exactly what I’m not sure). Only days before a European qualifying clash against Montenegro, Hart was caught on video dancing atop a bar with two ladies and singing into a fake microphone. I don’t know if you could qualify it as dancing, but it was some sort of bodily movement nonetheless. In fact, it was a significant improvement from the last dance routine he subjected the world to.

Just another example of entitlement and irresponsibility from the England camp, and a failure by the leaders of the team to prevent it. For England’s sake, I hope he’s better in goal than he is with his dance moves.

Being an English Goalkeeper is Tough

7 Sep

You might think the title refers to the rather obvious fact that English goalkeepers are sub-par for the most part. And while it is true, there is another more pressing issue for them. Not only are they committing blunders at an astonishing rate on the field, they have also been excluded from the latest hooker affair to hit the footballing world (and the second in England in two months).

This one involves England’s biggest crock at the moment, Wayne Rooney. When he wasn’t performing disappearing acts on the pitch for the national team, Wayne had sex with 21 year-old escort Jennifer Thompson of Bolton. To be precise, seven times in four months while his wife Colleen was pregnant with their first child.

While her parents believed she was serving drinks as a bartender, Jennifer was serving up her body instead to six defenders, three midfielders, and four strikers, with two of the players married with children. NO GOALKEEPERS!!  Is it because they make less money? Or did she watch the World Cup and make a logical business decision – find the best players with the most money and earn the most of your other hooker buddies. Sleep with a goalie and you’ll be a laughing stock or broke.

Let’s be straight here though. While I poke fun at this latest episode involving adultery and infidelity, it is completely inexcusable. Perhaps the English press should stop posting headlines calling their national team coach a jackass, and start attacking the heartless pigs who care more about spread-eagle young women than playing good football for their country – and who then use the manager as their excuse for playing so poorly.

And if you thought that was bad, England is also suffering from a rapid increase of injunctions granted by the High Court to allow footballers to keep their mistresses silent. And the media STILL blame Fabio Capello for England’s football demise?

Perhaps this whole idea of blooding the young players is not simply because they are more skilled than the veterans who litter the roster at the moment, but they can guarantee 100% focus since they are too young to have wives and children to cheat on.  Just a thought…

(More photos of Ms. Thompson after the jump)

(in the middle)
(Photos courtesy of bild.de)

EPL Week 2 Wrap-Up

23 Aug

The number 6, scribbled three times in succession, has haunted the superstitious and religiously fanatic world for centuries as the mark of the devil. To be honest, superstitions don’t quite do it for me. All they do is incite and create unnecessary fears. I do believe in karma though, and with a capital K, Karma swept through West London and Craven Cottage as the real Red Devils of United got bit in the ass. However, it’s still impossible to ignore how the remainder of England witnessed devilry in the South, Northeast, and middle of the country as Arsenal, Chelsea, and Newcastle each put their opponents to the sword by a score of 6-0. In Chelsea’s case it’s the second successive game doing so.

Chelsea are running rampant having scored 29 goals in their last 5 league games. They already enjoy a +12 goal difference and don’t appear to be letting up one bit.  It’s hard to truly judge their dominance after wins over the likes of West Brom and Wigan. Especially Wigan, who have now been outscored 10-0 in the first two weeks following an opening day drubbing to newly promoted Blackpool. I was wrong to predict Roberto Martinez being sacked by Thanksgiving. It looks to be an overly generous prediction at that, and he could very well be axed by the end of September depending on how things progress. As for Chelsea, they’re next three games are home to Stoke City, away to West Ham, and home to Blackpool. Sounds like another 20 some-odd goals. We’ll get a better idea how good they really are the last week of September when they travel to Manchester City followed by a home stand against Arsenal. In the meantime, enjoy the goal-fest while it lasts Blues fans.

Speaking of Arsenal, they too ran riot putting up six against a hapless Blackpool. To be fair to the Tangerines, they played with ten men for the better part of an hour following a deserved red card for Ian Evatt. Prior to that, it was only 1-0 and Blackpool looked keen to expose Arsenal’s consistent inability to safely deal with crosses into the middle. Nevertheless, Evatt’s expulsion spelled the end for Blackpool as they were completely out-passed and out-classed by the Gunners. A typically beautiful and artistic showboat by Wenger’s boys. Obviously, the talk of the town is Theo Walcott, having netted a hat-trick just like he did two years ago against Croatia. I do hope people see it for what it was – a young lad having a great afternoon scoring thrice, and nothing more. Capello was right to leave him home during the World Cup noting his tendency for inconsistency. Theo reached a high point this weekend. Now, it will behoove him to silence his doubters (yours truly) and continue playing like this for the rest of the season if he wants the England call-up everyone claims he deserves. Same goes for Arsenal as a whole. If they continue to look pedestrian against the big clubs (Liverpool last week) and then turn it on for the minnows, a 3rd or 4th place finish will be nothing short of guaranteed.

Finally, Premiere League football returned to Tyneside as Newcastle welcomed Aston Villa to St. James’ Park. Pitiful, pitiful Villa. How a club of Aston Villa’s status can be completely man-handled like that in only the second game of the season is shocking. You would have maybe expected it in the first week following their manager’s resignation three days prior, only they won 3-0 and any anticipated sluggishness was thrown by the wayside. Well, Newcastle had different plans for their opponents. An atrocious penalty miss by John Carew in the 10th minute opened the floodgates as Newcastle scored two minutes later and never looked back. Andy Carroll, the 21-year old striker, claimed his first hat trick for the club and Joey Barton ensured his pornstar mustache would disappear for good. A quality win for Newcastle and extremely important in terms of confidence as they look to reassert themselves in England’s top tier. As for Villa, owner Randy Lerner better find himself a full time manager and fast. After watching them implode to, let’s be honest here, lesser opposition, Lerner must know his team needs leadership if they have any inkling of achieving success this campaign.

Elsewhere, in arguably the most entertaining match of the weekend, Fulham scored late to draw with Manchester United at Craven Cottage. Alex Ferguson was surprisingly honest and candid in the post match interview claiming Fulham fully deserved the point. And he was right. United dominated the first 15 minutes and went ahead off a Scholes screamer, but after that they went flat. With Rooney at home suffering from a virus, Berbatov and Chicharito failed to truly threaten the Fulham defense save a few chances on goal. Fulham worked the ball around marvelously throughout, leading to their equalizer soon after halftime. Not surprisingly, United’s second highest scorer last season (the opposition) struck again as Brede Hangeland fumbled a corner off his knee and into his own net. Karma is a bitch though. Nani’s terrible penalty take gave Fulham a lifeline, and Hangeland seized it with the equaliser to cancel out his screw-up 5 minutes earlier. A great point for Fulham. A hiccup for United. But Red Devil fans may worry just a bit, as Rooney’s malaise and his replacement’s ineptitude to score may leave United in a spot of bother moving forward.

Elsewhere, West Brom rebounded by defeating Sunderland 1-0. Birmingham defeated Blackburn 2-1. West Ham continues to suck, getting tonked 3-1 at home to Bolton. Tottenham defeated Stoke City away 2-1, while Everton can’t seem to find a way not to start slowly as they threw away a lead and two points drawing with Wolverhampton 1-1 at home. Manchester City and Liverpool meet Monday afternoon in a very important game for both clubs.

EPL Week 1 Wrap-Up

17 Aug

First weekend is in the books and to be quite honest, it was as exciting as any opening weekend in recent memory. Opening match days are always an entertaining affair – newly promoted teams, reigning champs setting out to defend their trophies, the one month of the year when the UK enjoys sunlight and warm weather… This weekend had a different feel to it though. A sense that there was so much more at stake for every team involved. Whereas in years past the EPL has mirrored Spain and Scotland’s two horse race, but with four teams, there are new kids on the block disrupting the established order. It is no longer a formality that Chelsea, United, Arsenal, and Liverpool will claim Champions League spots. Clubs are in economic shambles, so the money earned by qualifying for a European tournament is a vital lifeline. Throw in the fact that an extremely quiet transfer window has resulted in minor changes (except on the blue side of Manchester of course), and you can see why this past weekend made first impressions ever so important.

The results were a mix of the expected and the extremely unexpected. For the latter, we go straight to the DW Stadium in Wigan.

Making their first trip to England’s top flight in 39 years, Blackpool were on everyone’s relegation list to start the season. Mind you this was supposed to be a home game, except for the small inconvenience that their stadium expansion remains unfinished. So an opening day at Bloomfield Road in front of 13,000 home fans in neon orange turned into a less-than-lavish road trip up to Greater Manchester. Didn’t matter one bit. Marlon Harewood scored twice as The Seasiders tore apart Wigan by a final score of 4-0, prompting seven year old Kian Kelly to strike the above pose landing him on every back page in Britain. A truly unbelievable result which nobody saw coming. Wigan on the other hand are in trouble. My pick to be relegated couldn’t have made me prouder, although I do feel bad for manager Roberto Martinez – a genuinely nice guy who exudes nothing but class on and off the pitch. Maybe a bit too nice though, because he’ll be out of a job by Thanksgiving.

Elsewhere, in arguably the second most anticipated match of the weekend, Liverpool faced off against Arsenal at Anfield. This had the feeling of a Champions League night, as the Liverpool fans were enraptured in song and involved in every movement of the game. They had plenty of reason to be excited with a clean slate, a new manager, and a more positive outlook than last season. After a straight red for Joe Cole late in the first half, Liverpool still managed to take the lead through David Ngog only to lose it on a rare Pepe Reina blunder gifting Arsenal the equalizer. Call it karma for Reina, who Arsenal fans were none-too-pleased with after his shenanigans with Cesc Fabregas. A 1-1 draw isn’t terrible for either club after such a difficult opening day match, although Liverpool will rue the missed opportunity at the full three points. Liverpool looked decent, and actually played much better with ten men. Carragher looked rather useful, although I expect his form to dip dramatically. Overall, Liverpool’s defense held firm led by an inspiring performance from Javier Mascherano in the midfield.

As for Joe Cole’s debut, aside from the red card, he was pretty bad. He rarely worked his way into the game on offense, and numerous times got in Gerrard’s way, literally. As for Arsenal, tons of possession and pretty passing got them nowhere near the goal, and I suppose Fabregas’ presence would have made a difference. They got a lucky point, but Arsene Wenger must have seen his team falter in the areas where they’ve needed to sign players for a while now – and he’s been reluctant to do so.

They need a goalie and they need one badly. Almunia is terrible. On the bright side, it looks like either Mark Schwartzer or Shay Given are on their way to North London which will guarantee the Arsenal at least 3-4 more wins than last season. New center-back Laurent Koscielny showed some bright spots, but will need to get much better and more disciplined. Nasri had a great game and young Jack Wilshire did his best to impress for 60 minutes. A healthy starting 11, a new goalie, and some depth on the back line isn’t too much for Arsenal to hope for with two weeks left in the transfer window. Acquire all three and the Gooners should challenge the top two easily.
The most anticipated match of the weekend ended up rather boring, save Joe Hart’s performance. England found their new #1 as Hart racked up 8 heroic saves to keep his team in the game. Tottenham could easily have been up 5-0 in the first half were it not for City’s young keeper. Tottenham needed to finish their chances, but all in all this team looks legit. Manchester City on the other hand looked like a collection of players – not a team. Mancini also looked like a man with no balls. ZERO testosterone. If you want to challenge in the Premiere League you need to attack and do everything to win. Mancini came to London not to lose, rather than seek a victory. It was evident with Tevez deployed as a lone striker up front and a midfield of De Jong, Barry, and Yaya Toure. SWP is a useless midget, while the future of England’s right wing in Adam Johnson sat on the bench for 68 minutes. If earning a draw was his game plan, then he succeeded. Let’s hope he starts going after teams, because a fourth place finish won’t be handed out to City on a silver platter.

I said Chelsea would win 8-0. So I was off by two goals and they only scored six. Coming back in style, the defending champs let the league know they will be a force this season. Or will they? It was telling to see ZERO new faces in the starting line-up for the Blues. Their biggest issue will be depth this season, even with the upcoming signing of Ramires. A comfortable opening win, but I’ve got my doubts if they get hit with some injuries.

Newcastle returned to the top flight only to get thumped by Manchester United 3-0. Best sign for United? Three different players scored and none of them was Rooney. United will need contributions from everyone in addition to Rooney if they want to unseat Chelsea.

Elsewhere, Aston Villa beat a hapless West Ham 3-0 less than a week after their manager upped and left. Everton got off to another pathetic start losing 1-0 away to Blackburn on a howler from Tim Howard. Bolton and Fulham drew 0-0, as did Birmingham and Sunderland 2-2. And Wolverhampton, accompanied by a top goal nominee for the season, defeated Stoke 2-1.

Remember it’s still the first week. In a month’s time this table could be turned on it’s head. But it sure is good to have club football back on the weekend docket.

Congratulations again to Blackpool…you’re still finishing dead last.

Practice Makes Perfect

27 Jul

Creativity in the Spanish camp apparently runs through every level of their national football program. The U-19 squad converted this cheeky, cheeky, cheeky free kick against England today in the semi-finals of the U-19 European Championships.

Right off the training pitch:

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